Nine Grouchoisms
Groucho (Julius Henry) Marx
1890-1977

1. "Remember, men, we're fighting for this woman's honour; which is probably more than she ever did."                                    Duck Soup (1933)
   
   
2. "Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
   
   
3. "The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open."
   
   
4. I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception."
   
   
5. "A moose is an animal with on horns on the front of his head and a hunting lodge on the back of it."
   
   
6. "Marriage is a wonderful institution.  But who wants to live in an institution?"
   
   
7. "You're only as young as the woman you feel."
   
   
8. "I could dance with you until the cows come home.  On second thought, I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home."
   
   
9. "I drink to make other people interesting."