The Top 15 Features of www.Amish.Net
The Top 5 List www.topfive.com
Copyright 2000 by Chris WhiteThe new Amish.Net website says it represents the "more progressive settlements" of the rigidly old-fashioned Christian sect famous for its quilts, barn-raisings and furniture.
15> As the site loads, little animated Amish guys appear on the screen to construct the frames right before your eyes.
14> "This site best viewed in black and white."
13> Virtual Butter Churn
12> Catch the buggy and win a free quilt!
11> Real-time chat consists of opening a window and shouting at the top of your lungs.
10> "Kickin' Quaker.net's butt since 1994."
9> Must navigate pages by hand-cranking the computer.
8> Outhouse-cam!
7> "MAKE HORSESHOES FAST!!!!!!!!!!!"
6> Their "Top 5 Ways to Cook Sheep Intestines" list? It's not a joke!
5> Banner ad reads: "Calmly reason with the monkey and win $50!!"
4> eBray Donkey Auctions
3> "AskAmish" feature: Your on-line questions will be transcribed to parchment with a quill pen, presented to the Council of Elders and your answer returned in 4-6 weeks by carrier pigeon.
2> SpinsterDance
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Feature of www.Amish.Net...
1> Amish Porn Central -- Bare-Under-The-Bonnet Action! More than your barn will be raised!
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